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    A Tired Mama

    6:30 AM : My alarm goes off. it's buzzing some obnoxious tune that I thought i changed the night before. Obviously I didnt. I turn it off. I set my alarm to get up early to try and go for a run, get a shower and start the day off right. My body wins and sleep pulls me back under.

    7:20 AM: Our second alarm in the form of my 2 year old son bounces on our bed.  Though his mom AND dad are in the bed, its mom he chooses to snuggle...and head butt, and insistently tells me  to "Wake up"  My husband grabs him and says, "let momma rest"..but the toddler alarm has worked it's magic.I finally rise up and swing my legs over the side of the bed. If I hurry I can still run my mile and maybe squeeze in a shower. I quickly beat my husband to the bathroom. He gives the toddler his tablet and lets me sneak away to go do my run

    7:40 AM I'm dressed and out the door. I start my apple watch workout to run. I pound out a mile like the pro I am not. ha! A little jogging, a lot of walking. I listen to the morning devotional on my sermon audio app. When that's done I jog and pray a little and walk , I eventually turn on pandora and listen to some broadway songs, I'm crazier than you comes on from Addams family...I think at times I am crazy, or life can drive you crazy. I'm done in 18 minutes. 

    8:00 AM I'm still sweating as i walk into the house. I listen to hear if my son is still occupied in his room with his tablet. He is. I can sneak up and shower but I hear a wail. Ooh a wail that says, "Where are you, i've been crying for at least 5 minutes".  The shower will have to wait. i quickly put on a pot of oatmeal  and go to my daughters room. Shes 16 months old and I'm still breastfeeding. I greet her with a smile and say 

    "Good morning baby girl!"

    She narrows her eyes at me, gives me a smile and then jeykl/hydes me with another wail. She taps her thumb and index finger together and gives a blustery

    "mmmmilll" (milk)

    I grab her and settle into our position on her rocker and breast feed her. She's a one year old now and likes to make her feet touch my face while shes feeding. I say touch, but it's more like kick.

    its so much fun...

    I grab my devotional book that I leave on her dresser for her 20 minute morning feed. I read my morning devotional and meditate on the bible verses while keeping my face free from the kicks of a 1 yr old, so meditate may be a strong word, but I do my best to enjoy this peace before shes done.

    8:30 AM "Mommy!" My 2 year old son bursts into his sisters room as if he's seeing me for the first time today.

    "Mommy hi! how you sleep mommy?"

    He makes me smile. Hes learning so many new words and phrases,

    "I slept very well buddy thanks for asking" 

    "Hi Hayven" he excitedly greets his sister. Shes done feeding now as her head snaps up and off the boob as soon as he enters, hes her 2nd favorite person. she gives a cute "hiiiii" and waves at him. 

    8:45  I change the diapers, sit my son on the potty to pee as we lightly start potty training. Put clothes on both kids, brush their teeth and go check on breakfast.

    "Mommy eat eat! Eat!"

    I've got the oatmeal going. it should be done in about 10 minutes. I tell this to my toddler..it goes in one ear and out the other..

    "Eeeeaaaat! mommy i want tuh eeaaaaaat" 

    I quickly cut up some apple slices to give to him. Sit him and his sister in their chair, pop on mickey mouse clubhouse and give them each a yogurt. I get back to the oatmeal. 

    "Water! mommy waaaater!" hes thirsty. I stop and make a drink for both kiddos. 

    9:00 AM the oatmeal is done , dished out and popped in the freezer for 2 minutes for a rapid cool down. The kiddos love my oatmeal and dig right in as soon as I put it in front of them. the dogs start whining. Two long haired chihuahuas.. they were my first kids. Their whining gets louder, as I take the oatmeal out of the freezer, stir each bowl and plop a bowl down in front of each kid. I look at the office door and swallow my slight dissapointment. My husband has been working from home since the pandemic... I always ask him to at least take care of the dogs in the morning ..that it would help me out a lot. most of the time he does. this particular morning he does not

    9:15 AM as guilty as I feel about plopping the kids in front of the tv while they eat, they are currently occupied and I can get some other things done. I put away the dishes from the dishwasher and get a new load started with the dirty breaksfast dishes. I really need to shower. I let the dogs outside, clean up the potty pad in their room (they are pad trained so it's like another diaper, just one the floor) , I mop the laundry room floor because pee always ends up on it from the dogs. I check their food and water. The dogs are whining to get back in the house, I let them in 

    9:30 AM: I help baby girl with her oatmeal..shes given up using her spoon and is just grabbing it by the handful. I eventually let her as I spoon myself a few bites of oatmeal quickly. I get up to get myself some water when 

    10:00 AM: "All done, mommy i done"  says my handsome toddler boy ..motivated by her brothers insistance the 1 year old starts to push herself up and says

    "mmm giii ouuu" (me get up)

    I grab some wipes, and clean up baby girl first ,while urging  Big brother to take a few more bites of oatmeal. Hayven is down, I move her tray to the side. I strip her of her first outfit of the day, i set it on the floor. the dogs sniff the shirt, find the smeared oatmeal and go to town. I get her brother, wipe his hands , his clothes are still fine. He moves his tray off to the side himself. His sister tries to join in ... he not having that..she screams. I pick up her soiled outfit, not nearly as soiled anymore thanks to the doggie vacumns. I put her clothes in the laundry basket

    10:30 AM: I start to make myself a water bottle using my Owala which is seriously my favorite water bottle, and I'm due for a cup of coffee. I turn the keurig on but it needs more water..I grab a bottle to fill it..

    "Hayven nooo" Don screams. I see she's taken his woody toy. I tell her to share and distract her with a fly swatter.  I really need to shower. I give my husband a bowl of oatmeal in his office, hes on a call, I quietly set it down and back out. 

    "Outside mommy, I wan go ousside?"

    Ok buddy, yes just give me a moment let mommy make herself some water. He brings me his boots. Hayven is trying to put on my shoes. shes getting frustrated and starts to whine. I go to grab her and she signs for milk. We sit down for a quick session, my water bottle still empty.

    "Mommy ousside" Don bring his boots to me, nearly landing them on his sisters face. "I'm feeding your sister, we will go after shes done" he goes to the window and begins to whine. I warn him about the continued whining. "Youre a big boy now, you're not a whiner stop" 

    "But I wanna go ouside" 

    "Mommy said we would go outside in just a moment. play with a toy."

    10:45 AM: I put a new outfit on Hayven. Marvin (Daddy) comes in from his office. He runs to the kids pretending to be a dinosaur or a tickle monster.    "DaddY!"  they shout ... hes their hero. All fun. They laugh and get chased. He helps me get their shoes and jacket on. Tells me he has to go to another meeting in 5 minutes. I really dont want to go outside. I'd like to sort the laundry, clean up or work on my Blog, or a vlog or look for jobs, I bring a notebook outside with me, hopeful I'll be able to do some planning. 

    11:30 AM: We've been outside for sometime. I havent been able to write a thing. Hayven loves this paw patrol car, but she doesnt know how to turn the wheel so I'm constantly pulling her out of the grass and back on the sidewalk. Out of the bushes and back on the sidewalk. Reminding her brother to not crash into her, which is his new favorite way to play. *CRASH*...I really need to shower.. but its nice to be outside again.

    12:15: We get back in the house. I take off two coats and two pair of boots in addition to my own coat and shoes.  I put on a pot of water to make some mac and cheese . "Eaaaat mommy eeeaat" A familiar cadence.  Hayven is attached to my knees.  I need to drain the noodles in the sink across the kitchen. She makes it hard to take a step. I move her to the side of me. She screams. I drain the water, put in the packaged cheese, add shredded cheese, butter and milk. Shes back on my knees. I shuffly slowly with her arms attached. put the mac and cheese in the freezer for a moment to cool down quickly. 

    12:30 I put Hayven in her seat, followed by Don. I make them new drinks. I give them some chips and apple slices while the mac and cheese cools. 

    "Can watch woody?" my boy asks politely.

    "Sure buddy"

    I turn on Toy story. This helps him wait out the mac and cheese cooling down. I've relieved to not hear the repeated phrases and whines for a moment. A few moments later I grab the mac and cheese and set the bowls in from of the kids. I go to clean up. My coffee hasnt been made yet. I try it again. 

    *BAM* 

    Hayven has dropped her water. It spills on the floor. I grab a towel wipe it up. Don needs help scooping his mac and cheese.. I help him. I take a moment to sit beside them as they eat, as they need my help from time to time. I wonder how my son did they do so well with his oatmeal this morning but not the mac and cheese? go figure 

    12:45 Marvin comes out of his office for his lunch break. I take a whiny fussy Hayven out of her high chair. Clean her up and take her to her room. I put her in her nap sack, breast feed her and put her down for her one nap a day. I breathe.... I really need to shower. 

    1:00 PM My husband puts my son down for a nap. I go up to our bedroom and just lay on the bed and close my eyes for about 10 minutes. I go back downstairs and put in a load of laundry. I make my coffee, fill up my water bottle and I make myself a snack. I go upstairs, put on an episode of little house on the prarie and just enjoy my first uninterrupted moment. It's a good episode, the one where Albert and the other boy go on the camping trip. I turn on my computer to do some video editing for our next vlog. I really need a new laptop , as this one has little space. The one I really need is $3K , where do i get that from? I don't lol so slow and steady wins the race

    1:30 PM I only have 30 minutes before I have to do a facetime session for Interview coaching. My coaching sessions are an hour and give me some extra cash flow while I'm out of work. Plus I love pageantry and coaching is just something that comes so naturally for me

    2:45 PM the coaching session went a little long. I'm way to chatty. I need to be stricter about my time. If I hurry I can shower. *my bedroom door opens* 

    "Hi Mommy!" 

    The toddler is up early. it hasnt even been 2 hours for him. he usually sleeps 3 hours but lately they ave been 1 - 2 hours. I have him sit on the bed and play with his trucks while i check my email. 

    3:00 PM "Downstairs, wanna go downstairs"  He's up to early to go downstairs where his sister is still sleeping. I really needed to shower. but at least I got my coffee and a snack. Hayvens monitor goes off. shes awake now too . I'm so sleepy. I didnt go to bed until 2 am and its catching up with me now. I grab Don and we head to Hayvens room. 

    3:30 PM I breastfeed Hayven. Both diapers have been changed, a pull up for the toddler. I sit him on the potty. I havent asked him enough if he needs to potty. I'm failing at potty training my 2 1/2 year old. I look at my husbands office door. I'm  hopeful that its one of those light work afternoons... I hear him though, and hes on another meeting. *Screams* they are fighting over a tablet that shouldnt be out . I take it away , no more TV or tablets kiddos. play with toys ok? . They go to the kitchen, open a drawer and Hayven proceeds to take all manner of things out of the drawer. shes having a great time so I let her.  i shouldve showered instead of having coffee and quiet time. 

    4:00PM  I flip laundry , take some baskets to hayvens room. the kiddos follow. I attempt to sort clothes. Hayven pulls them out as fast as I sort them. shes cute. she signals for milk. I stop and feed her 

    4:30 PM I look at my watch, 30 more minutes before the Hubster is off work. the kids are fighting, and then they are not. Hayven brings me a book. I began to read it to her. Don wants in on it as well. I get on the floor so they can both sit in my lap. Hayven loses interest after the first go round. Don stays interested for 3 rounds. My mom facetimes me. I put on a smile, Hey kids talk to Mimi! They love a good facetime. I recount my day to my mom, shes recounts how life is going for her. we both have to go. the kids are hungry and I need to find them something to eat for dinner. I'm so tired.

    5:00 PM I make some homemade ramen noodles and bulgogi dumplings. Marvin is off work and plays with the kids. They still gravitate towards me in the kitchen , as I finish dinner. Marvin says he will serve them and send me upstairs for some me time. For that I'm so grateful

    5:30 PM I should take a shower but I really need to finish editing. I'm trying to grown my youtube and I have not been consistent in uploading. I promised myself to be more regular. Speaking of regular, I need to use the restroom 

    6:00 PM I begin editing my vlog, trying to be productive. I hear Hayven at the bottom of the stairs yelling for me. I try to ignore it and keep editing. I hit a good flow.

    6:30 PM I go back down to check on the Hubby and the kids. Kids don't bother their daddy as much as mommy so he's great, scrolling his phone, watching them play. Thankfully hes cleaned up dinner dishes. I've brought my laptop down in an effort to be with the family and do some work at the same time. The kids immediately hone in on the laptop,..must touch at all costs their minds must say. I shut it and put it away. 

    7:00 PM Bath time. I get the kids in while Marvin finishes cleaning the kitchen. I tell myself I'm going to bed early tonight no matter what. 

    8:00 PM Baths are done, we are in my sons room. Marvin pulls out his phone and announces it's time for family devotion . We each grab a kid, marvin reads the verses, tells a fun bible story. Hayven can't stay still for long but she does go over to Marvin and listens to him for a moment, So cute.. hes such a good father. How much have I even seen my husband today? 

    8:30 PM Kids are finally down. I finally go  eat some dinner. I really need to eat earlier but alas. Marvin grabs a snack and he tells me about his day.

    He doesnt ask me about mine.

    I'm secretly jealous of all the "me" time he got today.

    9:30 PM It's 9:30. I'm so tired. but I really need to write some stuff in my planner and finish editing this vlog. 

    11:00 PM  1 1/2 hours of working. How did time fly so fast? why am I not sleepy anymore?? I've finished editing the vlog. I begin the upload process. I FINALLY go take a shower. 

    11:30 PM I need me time, just unwind time. Marvin goes downstairs to give me some personal time. I go to youtube and find a disney vlogger to listen to in the background while I write some goals for the week. I'm getting up tomorrow at 630 am, I write. So I can run, shower and get breakfast ready and get some personal time before the kids get up.

    12:30 AM Marvin is back. We talk, we spend some time together.. I'm finally going to go to sleep. I grab my phone to check facebook. 

    1AM bad idea. Marvin is snoring.. and I finally join him..determined to be a better, more patient mother tomorrow, wake up at 630 am....run and shower. 


     

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